Order Only: Special Announcement

[alt_gredforge]

This is a tradition we began on our birthday over on the younger members' lock, and we understand they've been keeping up the tradition after we reached the age of 17 and left the youngsters on their own without our special guidance. But we think it's time we used the Order Only lock, because we're more serious about it. In a manner of speaking.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

Be it known that the Lord Protector,

The Supreme Governor of the Council of British Rule
Patron of the Pure
Sovereign of the Most Ancient and Most Noble Order of the Wand and Rose
Grand Sorcerer
Paramount Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot
and proud holder of the Order of Merlin, Crystal Star

or as we also like to call Him,

Marvellous Marvolo the Magnificent Malcontent
Lord Pustule
King of the Swill
His Fartulance

We think it is extremely important that everyone knows that:
We are going to beat you
Your days are numbered
Your hold over the Protectorate is being eaten away, inch by inch
We will awaken the Sleepers
People are rising up every day to say 'NO MORE!!'
You still haven't caught Sirius Black
You still haven't caught the leaders of the Order
No matter what Dolohov thinks, you STILL have enemies at Hogwarts who are committed to your destruction, who are growing more determined and cleverer every day
More and more people are joining us every day
Every person you arrest, every person you hurt, every person you kill will cause scores more to stand up and join us
You are not facing just pureblood wizards. You are facing halfbloods, squibs, and muggles, too.
Even your fluffy Teddy Bear Clarence isn't going to save you.


And in case we haven't made it perfectly clear:

His Excellency, the Lord Protector, is STILL a stupid PONCE!!!! And he always will be. Until we get rid of him for GOOD.

Thank you for your attention to this VERY IMPORTANT public service announcement!

Comments

[alt_gredforge]

We invite EVERYONE to add their further examples of His Ponciness, as well as further reasons why we are going to defeat him.

[alt_molly]

Merciful Merlin.

I almost had a heart attack when I opened my own journal this morning.

[alt_gredforge]

Splendid, ain't it?

Remember, we've always figured we inherited our facilities for charms from you, Mum. Stand up and take a bow.

[alt_molly]

Oh, you too! You'll give me pure white hair before I'm sixty.

Happy birthday, boys. You've certainly kept all the Weasleys' lives interesting!

As for what you said, hmmm.

Lord Voldemort, we know what you've done to try to make yourself immortal. But it isn't going to work, because we are going to hunt down and destroy those foul things one by one. We've already started, and we have several leads on what to do next.

I know that you think your state robes made you look quite splendid. But I keep thinking of the children's tale, 'The Chief Warlock's New Clothes.'

[alt_bill]

I'm glad you didn't add the smoke charm.

People would think their journals were burning up.

That's....impressive.

[alt_bill]

And by the way...Happy Birthday!

[alt_harry]

Sirius, do you know how to do the fireworks charm?

I think the 'your days are numbered' would be an awfully nice bit to share with everyone in the Protectorate.

[alt_pansy]

You two are utterly ridiculous, and quite wonderful.

Happy birthday, George and Fred.